Rabu, 26 September 2012

Nightmare!!!!


The past couple of nights I have been plagued with nightmares. You must know, I hardly ever, EVER get nightmares but when I do, they're bad. Sometimes I would tell my dad about the dream that I had, he would instantly call that a nightmare. I'm sorry, but no it's not. There is a huge difference between my dreams and my nightmares.

When I'm having a normal dream, I feel nothing. It doesn't wake me up, make it so I can't get back to sleep. Nothing. When I'm having a nightmare, I have anxiety in my dreams, it feels real, I feel stressed out and it ends up making me jerk myself awake. Then I can't get back to sleep because the anxiety attack in my dreams was real.

When I got Resident Evil 4 for the first time on Wii, I would play it for 6 hours straight, non stop. It got to the point that my eyes started glazing over and I had dreams that I was in the video game. My dad said that was a nightmare. I tried and tried to explain to him that it was NOT a nightmare. I didn't feel stressed out or have a anxiety attack.

He just considers that a nightmare because I had a dream that I was in the game. That brings me to an interesting point, which I've known for quite some time. The things you revolve yourself around will eventually take it's toll on you and mess with your Psychosis and you end up having dreams about it.

I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder so anything I obsess about will end up in my dreams, it happens all the time. My mom wanted to do a little challenge. She thinks my nightmares are being brought on by all of the horror movies I watch. I disagree. We made a deal that I wouldn't watch any horror movie for awhile so we can see if my nightmares stop or continue.

My nightmares haven't stopped but they come and go. I really don't think they're being brought on from the movies I watch or I would be getting them all the time. I told my mom I have been having nightmares lately and the first thing she asked was if I have been watching any horror movies, which I haven't. When I get nightmares they're always about the same thing. Chucky. Yes, I'm almost 25 and I still get nightmares about Chucky.

I had one about him last night and my other nightmare I had was about Leatherface, which is really weird. When I get nightmares they're never about horror villains like Leatherface, just Chucky. In that nightmare, I was in the woods with a bunch of people and some kid runs up yelling "Run! Run! He's coming, he's coming!" We all start running to who knows where and I begin to not run so fast and I'm thinking oh no, he's going to get me. And in my nightmare while I was running I kept thinking to myself, I'm going to hear the sound of the chainsaw soon.

Knowing I was going to hear that sound peaked my anxiety. Luckily, It never went of in my mind. Suddenly it switches to me hiding in an old run down cabin. People are screaming in the background and I kept repeating to myself "You're going to wake up soon, it's only a preview." After that I jerked myself awake and I couldn't get back to sleep until a few hours later.

We all have nightmares, some may seem silly to others but it leaves a huge impact on you. It all comes back to our Psychosis which makes our nightmares more scary to us then to other people.

Tidak ada komentar:

Posting Komentar